I turned to spirituality after losing faith in the state

Losing faith in the state led me to explore deeper spiritual truths. And rejecting centralized power can fuel your spiritual journey, too.

What if your journey toward spiritual awakening wasn’t some cosmic accident, but a direct response to state control?

For me, it was.

I didn’t become spiritual because I was “seeking answers.” I became spiritual because I couldn’t stand the lies, manipulation, coercion, and suffocating presence of a machine that demands obedience in every facet of life and punishes any attempt to seek power from within rather than from above.

The truth is, the state is the enemy of all true spirituality. Always has been, and always will be.

The state hates what it can’t control

Spirituality is, at its core, individualized inner sovereignty. It’s the belief, whether mystical or metaphorical, that truth, meaning, and moral order come from within or the divine, not from government mandates, committee consensus, or scientific decrees.

And that’s a threat to any regime, Left or Right, that wants to be your god.

Throughout history, every major state power has either:

• Co-opted religion and fused it with its authority (think the Roman Empire after Constantine or the Church of England),

• Outlawed it (like the Soviet Union, Mao’s China, or North Korea), or

• Mocked and marginalized it, reducing the spiritual to a “mental illness,” “pseudoscience,” or “conspiracy theory.”

They fear it because it liberates the individual from collective submission. It gives you a power they can’t tax, track, or censor.

“Scientific Atheism”: The state’s favorite religion

Communist regimes didn’t just ban spirituality. Many replaced it with “scientific atheism.” That phrase alone should make your skin crawl.

The Soviet Union taught that there was no God, soul, or inherent meaning. Only the Party, the worker, and the dialectic. Mao Zedong destroyed temples and replaced Confucian virtues with Little Red Books. The Khmer Rouge murdered monks and shamans, while North Korea literally deified its ruling family.

But even in the modern West, where we’re told we’re “free,” a similar pattern emerges. Spirituality isn’t banned. But the state and its cultural mouthpieces systematically discredit it. And it’s a prevailing theme in my dark paranormal Catenarian Chronicles series.

• Astrology? “Nonsense.”

• Paganism? “Dangerous.”

• Christianity? “Problematic.”

• Prayer? “Superstitious.”

• Energy healing, meditation, reincarnation, metaphysical thinking? “Woo-woo garbage.”

Why? Because anything that claims truth without state approval must be silenced. The state cannot tolerate an external source of authority. Not gods, conscience, or the cosmos. Nothing outside of itself.

The technocracy and the soul

Modern governments, especially those captured by the progressive managerial class, claim they’re “guided by science.” But what they really mean is institutionalized science. You know, the state-funded, bureaucratic-regulated, and stripped of metaphysics kind.

This is the new priesthood: White coats instead of robes, peer-reviewed papers instead of sacred texts, and “public health” orders instead of wise commandments.

But here’s the thing: True science and spirituality aren’t enemies. They both seek truth. It’s the state, and its obsession with control, that turns them against each other. Just like it leads everything else astray.

Spirituality as rebellion

This is why I say: I’m spiritual because I hate the state.

Not in the bumper-sticker or shallow contrarian sense. But in the deep, bone-level realization that every state survives on fear, and spirituality thrives on courage. Every state offers safety in exchange for your soul. But spirituality says: “No deal with the devil.”

And so I seek meaning in runes, symbols, dreams, ancient myths, hidden histories, and lost knowledge. Not because they’re fashionable, but because they’re as good as forbidden.

Because the state told me not to back when I attended one of their indoctrination camps between 1995 and 2009. And I know what the state fears most is a person who doesn’t fear it at all. Think of spirituality as Albus Dumbledore; the state as Lord Voldemort.

Spirituality is neither a weakness nor a retreat

It’s war. Not war against others, but with the lie that says your life, purpose, and destiny can be measured, taxed, licensed, and approved. Screw that sh*t.

So if you find yourself drawn to the mystical, esoteric, and divine… maybe it’s not because you’re “lost.”

Maybe it’s because deep down, you’re finally free and you lost your faith in the state. And d’you know who thinks along those same lines? Quinn Cozens, one of my protagonists in Beyond the Lost, my dystopian survival thriller.

Quinn’s no Christian, but he’s spiritual as f*ck. So much, he always wears a necklace with a Tiwaz pendant and he’s always thinking of Germanic/Norse gods like Odin, Tyr, and Thor. Often reaching out to them for guidance.

Want to learn more about Beyond the Lost? Go for it, and fall in love with the themes.